The Grass is always greener...

I'm a O95-C35-E86-A50-N55 Big Five!!

I took an online personality test today. Here are the results.

I'm a O95-C35-E86-A50-N55 Big Five!!

I've started experimenting with Panoramic photography. I took the top image in SanFrancisco. The bottom image is Venice Beach. You can see a high resolution version in my gallery. Just choose the Panorama Album. http://johnscottfore.photoshop.com/

Eye Candy

I love the Happy Tree Friends. I know it is sick and twisted but I crack up every time I watch.





If you like them you can see them all at MondoMedia

That's some old Sh*t!

A conversation overheard in the Paisley Caves somewhere in Oregon.
“Holy Crap, Bob!”
“What is it Jenkins?”
“It’s crap!”
“Come on Jinkins, what?”
“14,000 year old scat!”
“Ella Fitzgerald is here?”
“No you idiot it’s people poop…14,000 year old people poop”
“Whoa”

A team of Archeologists led by Dennis L. Jenkins discovered some turds in Oregon that prove humans were in North America much earlier than was previously thought. Follow the link to read the article from the New York Times.

I love this line. “Traces of its distinctive fluted projectile points have been found throughout the Americas.”

Juvenile toilette humor aside, it is a pretty amazing discovery.

Grilled Chicken with Sundried Tomato Pesto on SF Sourdough Bread

Grilled Chicken with Sundried Tomato Pesto on SF Sourdough Bread

Today my mind toiled over how to prepare the chicken breast I put in the refrigerator to thaw. Finally on the drive home it came to me.

I started by heating up my gas grill. Then, I pounded the breast to about ½” thick. I could see right away that the size of the breast would now be too unwieldy to manage on the grill. So, I cut it into two more manageable pieces and discarded the rest. (Actually, I put the remaining pieces into a zip top bag which will sit in the fridge until the meat turns green then I will throw it away. Thanks Mom.) I contemplated dried Italian seasoning but then conceded that it would probably just burn over the intense heat on the grill. I simply seasoned both sides with freshly ground sea salt and pepper and proceeded to the grill.

I generously lubricated the grill with olive oil and placed the chicken on the grate. I had just enough time to prepare the sundried tomato pesto. (I normally eschew products from jars that I can make from scratch but my neighbor turned me on to California brand.) I put about 4 tablespoons in a small dish and nuked it for a few seconds. This got the pesto nice and gooey and easy to spread.

After only 2 minutes the breasts were ready to turn. After turning I put a generous schmere of the pesto on the chicken. Then I hurried inside to get my bread and cheese ready. I sliced two pieces of real San Francisco sourdough about ¼” thick. I also sliced some mozzarella cheese. I lubed the bread with olive oil and hurried outside. After all, no amount of pesto will save an overcooked chicken.

The breasts were shuffled off to the cool side of the grill to rest and the bread went oil side down on the grill. I returned to the kitchen and this where things could’ve gone to hell. Being the ADHD kid that I am, I got distracted by the icky chicken goo on the counter. Death to Chicken Goo! When I returned to my bread it was a little more al carbon than I wanted. It only takes a second to go from golden brown and delicious to ugly blackened and malicious. Irritated, I put the cheese and chicken on the bread, transferred it to a plate and went to the kitchen. I let the whole thing have a flavor commingling moment while I finished tidying the kitchen.

The results were amazing. The chicken was perfectly moist and delicious. The amount of pesto was just right; it wasn’t brassy or overpowering as it can sometimes be. Most of the subtle flavors I love about SF sourdough were lost but the slight char was most certainly a happy accident. The sugars in the bread caramelized and created sweet undertones that complemented the chicken nicely. The cheese brought everything together. Mozzarella is a very mild cheese and anything else would have competed for flavor. Let me note that I got a little carried away with the oil which left the bread a bit greasy. Next time I’ll know better.

When I had finished the sandwich, I realized hadn’t even touched my drink and I forgot to get the chips I had set out. I guess it was good. Next time I hope I will think to take a photo. It looked as good as it tasted.

Winner Winner Chicken Dinner!

Five brilliant MIT students and their professor go to Vegas and make millions playing Black Jack. They have developed a fierce system to beat the house using secret codes and gestures. Counting Cards is not illegal but if the casino catches you – let’s hope your health insurance is paid up.

Jim Sturgess plays Ben Campbell, a shy and exceptionally gifted young man. He has been accepted into Harvard Medical and needs $300,000 for tuition. When his physics professor Micky Rosa (Kevin Spacey) invites him to join his Black Jack club Ben is reticent. When the lovely and seductive Jill Tayler (Kate Bosworth) tempts him with the Vegas superstar lifestyle Ben finally folds. Choi (Aaron Yoo), Kianna (Liza Lapira), and Fisher (Jacob Pitts who looks a lot like a young Kevin Bacon) round out the rest of the club.

They are incredibly successful and Cole Williams (Laurence Fishburn) is pissed. A new facial recognition software that will put him out of work looms on the horizon. Williams is the head of security at the Hard Rock Hotel. The Hard Rock is the last casino to use humans and video surveillance. If it’s not bad enough he will soon be out of a job, now some smart assed geeks are going to rob him of his pension. He plots revenge.

There isn’t a lot of time for real character development but we get enough to be fully engaged in the outcome of their actions. Director Robert Luketic is at the helm, which is a big move from the chick-flicks he is known for. Luketic is best recognized for the smash hit comedy Legally Blond which grossed nearly $100 million. His last film, Monster-In-Law, starring Jennifer Lopez and Jane Fonda also did well. Apropos of nothing, he is from Sydney and he is one of the boys.

This flick is a wild ride of plot twists and turns that will keep you guessing until the very end. Just remember, “Nobody is allowed to beat the system. It’s the cardinal rule of Vegas.”

Watch the trailer here: http://www.sonypictures.com/movies/21/

School Dress Codes

I have never been a proponent of school uniforms. I believe they strip youth of their individuality.

Times are not the same as when I was in school. The violence in schools today calls for measures that are more drastic. I am terrified by the thought of some kid carrying a firearm into my nephews' school. After watching the video below, I must change my opinion completely.

Leave a comment and let me know what do you think?

Mean Kitty (Pixel's first post)

hi iz pixel da cat
xcuz my typng itz hard 2 typ witowt thums
i wuz surfin the net 2day and i fond thiz qt video
he shur iz qt
da kitty iznt bad ether
i bet hiz toes are tasty

Hey kid's I've got good news and bad news...

Good news is we've got the Cartoon Network. Bad news is I shot your Mom.

Stupidity is not a crime but manslaughter is.

http://www.wcsh6.com/news/watercooler/article.aspx?storyid=83472

I only got eyes for you

I received the following missive in an email today. The sender is a coworker and friend. She is very sweet and I know she truly means every bit of it.

The message is as follows:

TATER PEOPLE

Some people never seem motivated to participate, but are just content to watch while others do the work.
They are called "Spec Taters.”

Some people never do anything to help, but are gifted at finding fault with the way others do the work.
They are called "Comment Taters.”

Some people are very bossy and like to tell others what to do, but don't want to soil their own hands.
They are called "Dick Taters.”

Some people are always looking to cause problems by asking others to agree with them. It is too hot or too cold, too sour or too sweet.
They are called "Agie Taters.”

There are those who say they will help, but somehow just never get around to actually doing the promised help.
They are called "Hezzie Taters.”

Some people can put up a front and pretend to be someone they are not.
They are called "Emma Taters.”

Then there are those who love others and do what they say they will. They are always prepared to stop whatever they are doing and lend a helping hand. They bring real sunshine into the lives of others.
They are called "Sweet Taters.”

If you know any "Sweet Taters" send this to them!!

Sometimes my twisted sense of humor gets the best of me.

I try to fight it. Ok, no I don’t.

Well, I had to create a few of my own.

There are those who like to remove the arms and legs from other taters and they are called Ampu Taters.

If Karen Carpenter had been a spud she’d be a regurgi tater.

Taters who like to go on and on and won’t shut up are called Annie Taters.

Few people know that Judas was actually vegetable. Yes, it is true, he was an apos tater.

These taters are the most fertile of all the taters. They are known as the Ges Taters.

Possessing great patients and a gift for helping others who have fallen off the wagon, these are most certainly rehabili taters.

Taters exposed to radiation and become weird freaky monsters are unmistakably the infamous mut taters.

Taters who take what could have been a sweet message and twist it into something sick and wrong are irri taters.

Last but not least.

Taters who are a severe pain in the ass, like the author of this blog, are obviously pros taters.

Now, I know some of you are as sick and twisted, if not more, than I. Hit the comment button and give me a few more.

My sister had these to add.

If you work for EMS you are a resucitater unless you overtook your meds then you are an incompasitater and your patient just became a vegitater.
Which isn't so bad considering the assasinater was a premeditater decapitater and your head is still a rotater.

Someone who drives around the city looking for his exit is called an interstater. Once he crosses into the next state he becomes a multistater. Of course after three states he is a tristater and obviously re-entering the state in which it all began makes him...a re-stater!

Never Back Down (Movie Review)

If you liked Karate Kid you will like Never Back Down. This somewhat predictable flick is a tale of a young man who moves to a new city and new school after getting into some trouble. He is having a hard time adapting to his new life. The situation is worsened by a video on the internet showing the event that forced his move.

Our hot headed hero, Jake (Sean Faris), collides with the schools smack-talkin bully(Cam Gigandet) Ryan. Despite his all of his boxing prowess, he is no match for Ryan’s mixed martial arts fighting style. After a serious pounding, Jake decides to beat (literally) this jerk at his own game. Max (Evan Peters), another Ryan's victims, leads Jake to a gym where the two train to have their revenge. You can expect many edge-of-your-seat graphic fight scenes and a montage or two.

The sappy drama seems to bog down the plot. The history with his father, mom doesn’t like fighting and setting an example for his brother all get in the way. Why can’t a guy get the crap beat out of him and then want revenge? Please don’t teach me a lesson. If I wanted a moral, I would see Aesop’s Fables on Ice. Then there is the token girlfriend, Baja (Amber Heard), over whom there is much drama and tension. We cannot have a movie without that, now can we.

I was pleased to see an openly gay character in the film that was not loud and effeminate. The nameless character openly flirts with Jake without being chided for his overt remarks.

Even if you do not like sports films, which I don’t, you will fall in love with Jake and cheer him through till the end. I cannot suggest that you race to the theater to see this one, but catch it on DVD if you can.

Absolutely Incredible Kid Day

Today marks Camp Fire USA’s 12 annual Absolutely Incredible Kid Day. This is a special day on which adults are encouraged to write a letter to an Absolutely Incredible Kid. We all know kids who do incredible things. This is an excellent opportunity to give him/her words encouragement and tell them how you feel. A quick note or email is all it takes to make a difference in a kid’s life. You can learn more here. http://www.campfireusa.org/a_i_kid_day/

Doomsday – Don’t Bother

I think the producers of this movie named it appropriately. I say this because I caught myself wishing for Armageddon while I watched it. In fact, I think I actually said aloud, “Jesus Christ will this movie ever end!”

Doomsday is the worst movie I’ve seen in a theater since The Blair Witch Project. The trailers looked good and I was looking forward to a new edition to the post apocalyptic, Mad Max genre of sci-fi movies. I thought this title might put on a new spin like the Resident Evil and 28 Days films did for zombie flicks.

It starts out well enough. A deadly, incurable, virus spreads quickly through Scotland. The UK builds a wall, traps everyone inside, and leaves everyone to die. Now, I’m not one those “That would never happen,” kind of movie goers but my BS detector tingled a little here. How the hell did they build a 100 foot wall around Scotland that fast without anyone wondering what they were doing. Aside from that, it’s all going ok. Then, the rest of the world turns its back on the UK because of what they’ve done to the Scotts.

Fast-forward 20 years. Turns out the virus, was bio-weapon (gasp), and has now been released in London by mistake. The Brits have been monitoring the “dead zone” from space and have detected survivors. Some crazy doctor stayed behind because he thought he had a cure. He must have. Now they assemble a crack team to go in, find him, bring back the cure, and save all of London. Grab your hand basket because this is where it all goes to hell.

What ensues now is a series of scenes that not only goes beyond any stretch of the imagination but is downright insulting to the intelligence. In one scene, we are told there are no utilities or amenities of any kind while in the next there is some Mohawked moron screaming into an amplified microphone. Oh it gets worse. They are running from the bad guys. The scene is gripping. Up ahead is a rusty steam locomotive. They jump in at the last possible moment, it starts up and is off like your father’s Oldsmobile. I guess in the year 2035 water turns to steam instantly. Please.

The characters are so shallow that I didn’t even care when one of them put a gun in his mouth and turned his grey matter into a pattern that would have made Jackson Pollock proud. I like gore. I admit it. I like when a movie makes my stomach squirm. Doomsday has so much gore you come to expect it and that isn’t fun at all.

The end will leave you scratching your head and wondering if you can recoup your lost $10 by sneaking into another movie. If you want to see a great action flick at the theater see The Bank Job or save 8 dollars and rent Mad Max.

How to get an airplane row to yourself

I don’t know anyone who enjoys commercial flying. The entire experience is sadistic from the time you park until you get your bags at your destination. The most excruciating part is being crammed into close quarters with strange people and whatever pathogenic cargo they may be carrying on their person. Yuck! If you are a larger than average person, like me, you can add back pain and muscle cramps to the ordeal. You can bet jamming all 250 pounds and 6 foot 3 inches of me in one of those seats designed for an anorexic midget is a lot of fun.

Well, my friends, I have the sure-fired method to insure an entire row to yourself. Next time you fly, find an open row and take the middle seat. Immediately acquire all the barf bags in the row. Lay two conspicuously on your lap while holding the other one open next to your face. Now, bug out your eyes and slowly rock back to front.

I guarantee you, if there are two empty seats on the flight, they will be yours.

Was she sittin' and thinkin' or...

The isolation in Western Kansas must really get to those people. I'm glad I got the hell out of Dodge (literally) when I was 18. Click the link below to read the news article.

http://www.foxnews.com/story/0,2933,337664,00.html

The Wedgie Dance

This happens to us all from time to time, at least those of us who wear underwear.I mean seriously, who cannot relate to this dilemma? I love when a creative advertising group takes a taboo topic and puts out in the open for all to see.

Enjoy.

The link is no longer available. Go to www.youtube.com and search for wedgie dance.

10,000 BC, A Mammoth Tale

Unless you’ve been living under pile of mammoth dung, you’ve probably seen trailers for 10,000 BC. Often when a movie is hyped to the point of complete market saturation, the studio has spent major dollars on a flop and is trying to fill as many seats as they can on opening day. I am pleased to report that is NOT the case with 10,000 BC. I must admit I had my doubts when I saw it last night.

The plot takes you on a wild journey across hundreds of miles during a time before the pyramids. If you’re one of those type that says, “that could never happen,” out loud at a movie, stay home (or at least don’t sit by me)! However, if you can let go of reality, you will have a lot of fun with this flick. This is a nice action adventure story with all of the common elements of an epic tale: Man vs. Nature, Man vs. Man, Man vs. Himself, an obligatory romance and, of course, giant man-eating emus.

I am a bit of a snot when it comes to special FX and I have a low tolerance for cheesy FX. I found 10k BC to be visually and audibly spectacular. The CGI is well rendered and all but one character is completely believable. The sound effects are completely immersive and not once did I find myself distracted by the score. That is not to say the music is memorable. I couldn’t hum a single bar if I had to.

I’d give it 3.5 out of 5. If you’re an FX nut like me, definitely see it at the theater. If you’re looking for an art film with a boat load of Oscar nods keep looking. 10k BC is sure to have you engaged until the surprising end.

Bad Dust

My sister sent me this story. It reminded me of some of the silly things I believed when I was a kid.

Picked up son from Sunday School today and he hands me a crumpled up piece of brown construction paper.
Me: “what’s this”
DS: “That’s the bad dust.”
Me: “ Bad Dust? ”
DS: “ We learned all about Jesus and the Bad Dust.”
Me: “I don’t know that one, tell me what it’s about.”
DS: “Well, Jesus was walking along in the wilderness and he got all dirty. He
met this man who put him under the water and babatized him and washed all
the bad dust away. That’s why they called him John the Bad Dust.”

Can’t make this stuff up.

I used to think the song went, "I can see clearly now, I can see all popcicles in my way"

Peeps Show

I thought I was going to a peep show last night but it appears I misread the sign.

Downtown Kansas City Sunset

I snapped these shots a couple of weeks ago of a stunning downtown sunset.

A Love That Knows No Boundries

I received an email today with the attached image and video clip. While watching I was moved to tears (I cry at Hallmark ads) but being skeptical of emails, I decided to learn more. What I discovered was very touching.

A couple of chaps named Anthony Bourke and John Rendall purchased a lion cub in 1969 from the Harrods department store in London. It was not understood at the time that wild animals do not make good pets.

For a year, Bourke and Rendall took Christian the lion to social functions, local restaurants, and for rides in the back of their Bentley. Christian enjoyed playing football and romping in the park with his two human companions. The three would become best friends. Eventually, though, the chaps would have to make a difficult decision.

As Christian matured in age, his size increased exponentially. He went from a 35lb cub to a rather daunting 135lb young lion. (Who wants to clean that cat box?) Bourke and Rendall quickly realized that the streets of London were no place to raise a lion.

After hearing about wildlife conservationist George Adamson and his wife Joy, who raised a lion cub called Elsa in Kenya then rehabilitated it into the wild; they decided to contact Adamson for help. Bourke and Rendall released Christian into the wild in 1979 on the Kora Reserve in Kenya where he slowly became accustomed to his natural habitat.

Many years later Bourke and Rendall returned to Kenya to take part in the filming of a documentary, The Lion at Words End, featuring Christian. The documentary was released in 1971 along with a book, A Lion Called Christian, authored by Anthony Bourke and John Rendall. The movie clip below is from that film.

Experts warned the two men that Christian was now a wild animal and would not remember them. Watch the video below and tell me if you believe the “experts.”

I want my own blog

Pixel seems to think she needs her own blog. I told her to write a few
entries for mine first, then we'd talk. What do you think?

I want my own blog

Pixel seems to think she needs her own blog. I told her to write a few entries for mine first, then we'd talk. What do you think?

Damn you Miche!

One of my best friends recently started blogging at http://www.afinemist.blogspot.com/. I’d considered a blog, but it wasn’t until reading his that I decided it would be good for me too. When I read this article today, the decision was final. Discovery News : Discovery Channel.

I have also noticed my writing skills have diminished over the years and I think blogging will be a good way to keep my skills sharp. Well, at least, it may keep them from getting duller.

In this blog I will write about things I find interesting or are on my mind at the time. That could be anything from artistic topics like movies, music and food to geeky stuff about Photoshop or the latest gadget I bought or think I have to have.

One last thing, I have a corny since of humor. You have been warned.